TaylorHaps

2-6 June 2018

Had a grand time! Ada loves it as much as I do. 🙂 We drove down on Saturday and spent Sunday through Tuesday in the parks. Ada’s feet were killing her most of the time but we had 3 days and Max Passes so we were fine.

Moab

May 2018

I finally got to be on the LA trip. We camped in green river and spent a day in goblin valley, one in arches, and did a river trip. So much fun.

1-2 April 2018

I had spring break so I planned to go to Disneyland for a couple of days. Ada really wanted to come and could spare the time so off we went. Sunday was Easter so we decided to do the Easter Egg challenge and find all the hidden eggs. Monday we spent at California Adventure until they closed and then did a couple more hours at Disneyland. I bought an Annual Pass when I came with the Ransoms and these trips to Disney have been the brightest spots in my life. I look forward to them so much.

15-18 March 2018

I went to an NSTA conference. Met up with my fellow teachers Joilyn Lincoln, Becky Curtis, and April Thompson (that’s us below left to right in front of the MLKJ reflecting pool. Awesome stuff learned. Inspiring places visited. Much soul food consumed. In other words…a triumph. 🙂

March 2018

The Ransoms had never been to Disneyland so they asked to me to come along and help them get the most out of their visit.

On the way down we visited Valley of Fire state park in NevadaThe next day we did Huntington Beach during the day and Crystal Cove in the evening.

We spent Monday at Disneyland and Tuesday at California Adventure. I had the greatest time experiencing things “for the first time” again through their eyes. It was such a blast!

I flew home because I couldn’t spare more time off work and they were planning another day in LA and then the drive home so I actually did some of a third day just on my own before my flight left. It was fun but I missed my new family.

November 2017

I get a whole week off for thanksgiving so Steve and I rented a condo in St George. We took day trips out to Snow Canyon where we climbed around in lava tubes (cut my legs up and tested the limits of my obnoxious knees and my acrophobia) and enjoyed the dunes and then to Zion Canyon where we tested our patience with road construction, explored the sunroof and the filters on my phone camera, and hiked up to Weeping Rock at sunset.

January. Went bowling for Tam’s birthday

I visited national and state parks all over the western US and took different people with me each time. Collected a great mass of stickers for my car 🙂

22 July 2018

I’m writing these 3 posts almost a year after my dad passed. I haven’t been able to talk about it much. Losing him has been the hardest thing and I’m still struggling with it. At the advice of some people and as my heart dictated I did some things to aid in my grieving.

I took my full 6 bereavement days off of work and all of my PTO days throughout the year. A sweet colleague even donated a couple of her days to me. It has been the worst for me as far as absences go.

The funeral was the Saturday before I was supposed to start pre-service meetings. Needless to say I was a bit overwhelmed with the idea of starting school so I was excused for most of that week including Back to School Night.

We crammed the car full of Ada’s stuff and moved her into her new place in Cedar to start school at SUU (as if I wasn’t already a huge wreck!). I went hiking with the ransoms up to Kanaraville Falls and saw the shows that I missed the weekend my dad passed.

I took a Sunday and went hiking by myself up to a high mountain lake above Silver Lake. Gary had gone and said it was amazing. I went swimming in it (freezing!) and sat on a boulder and cried and wrote for hours (I had lugged my computer with me all the way up that mountain. Stayed until sundown. Nature is such a huge healer for me and it was something that my dad loved too.

I went to see a therapist and she told me I had depression. She gave me some suggestions of things that might help, conformed that my grief was normal, and listened to me. By the end of September I was in such a bad place that I took a week off of school and followed my therapist’s advice to try to find things that gave me comfort and made me happy. So I did some of my top things…being with Ada, walking the temple grounds, sitting alone atthe beach, and going to Disneyland. 🙂

I picked up Ada and spent some time in Vegas with her.

I visited the Redlands and Newport Beach temples on my way to my little place in Long Beach.

I spent the next couple of days at the beach at various times. Picked up bags of trash. Had great fish too.

Then I spent a couple of days at my Happy Place. I have done lots of Disney Therapy this year. It reminds me of my dad and being there always makes me so happy. I did all the rides that remind me of my dad, I met Santa 🙂 and enjoyed the Halloween decorations all over. My little Mickey was my buddy on the trip.

The next day I went to Universal Studios a place I went several times with my dad. There were lots of new things (Harry Potter) but also some familiar ones (the backlot tour with Back to the Future, the Bates model, and the Jaws exhibit that scared me to death).

On the way home I took sunset photos of the California fauna and then went to the St George temple. So peaceful.

Ada and I also visited the new Cedar City temple in November just before it was dedicated.

I saw my family doctor and started an anti-depressant. I’m still taking one (not the first one because it gave me suicidal thoughts) and I guess it helps.

When I was having a rough time, I had the sweetest surprise. My two darling sisters-in-law Teri and Anne brought me presents every single day. They called it the 12 Days of Happy. 🙂 Day 4 was Ada coming home for the weekend. Day 6 was my favorite Indian food delivered to me at work (too busy eating it to take a photo). They ended the week with Susie patching up the holes in my bathroom walls, Teri and Anne painting it with the cutest turtles ever, a massage, and the sweetest basket of notes from the family. Made me cry and cry. I sure love my Taylor fam.

5 August 2017

There were some disagreements in the family about various funeral arrangements but we got through those and ended up with a nice service. Not as well attended as we thought was appropriate for such a well-loved man but it was on a Saturday in the summer so we lost some to vacations.

The viewing was Friday night and Saturday morning. Jul and I put together a memory table for him and many people sent flowers.

It was tough for us but at least he is now whole and can golf and play racquetball and take pictures on the other side. 🙂

All of the siblings and older grandkids shared memories of my dad. It was really sweet. I gave a talk which was very hard to write and just as hard to give through many tears but the spirit was there so it went well. I used some of his words from his writings. Here’s a copy if you care to read it.

Dad’s funeral

After the graveside service and pictures we had lunch at Susan’s church. It was very nice to be with family. What a great support system.

Late July-early August 2017

It started as a simple infection in his foot that didn’t get properly treated. On Thursday, 20 July, he was diagnosed as septic at the care center and immediately sent to the hospital. I was in Logan seeing operas with Steve. We contemplated skipping Yellowstone and Tetons altogether but my family encouraged me to go. While away, a surgeon amputated part of my dad’s foot and felt confident that he had gotten all the infection.

Caution! Contains graphic images. Proceed with caution

He was conscious and upbeat (of course!) on Saturday but as the weekend progressed his condition worsened.

His limbs were swollen and red, he had a terrible rash all over, and his organs started to fail. They put in a feeding tube and even did dialysis. We stayed by his side all week waiting for him to improve. On Wednesday morning, I was with him when he woke up and he was conscious and we had a conversation about his condition which he called a “tough case” and he joked a bit with me. I felt after that morning that he would definitely improve but it was not to be. I feel like that morning was just a tender mercy, allowing me to spend a few last minutes with my dad.

On Thursday, I had tickets to see Shakespeare shows with Ada and Teri so I reluctantly left my dad’s side to drive to Cedar City. During the intermission of As You Like It, I got a call from my family. I spent the second half outside pacing the streets while we discussed my dad’s situation and decided that no artificial respiration would be used and all support would be withdrawn as soon as Dave and I could get there.

I broke the news to ada that I would have to leave. I stayed for a promised late-night swim and then drove the 3 hours home sobbing all the way. Here is a recording I made on the trip.

Dad notes voice recording

I got there at 3am. I just missed Uncle Dave and Aunt Nikki who had been there that evening but needed to get home.

We all gathered around his bedside. The nurse removed all the tubes and we shaved him (he always hated a scruffy beard face!) but kept the oxygen mask on until Dave and his girlfriend Angie got there on Friday at about 3. We said our goodbyes and Gary gave him the sweetest priesthood blessing of release. When the mask was removed, all the siblings and Susan gathered in a huge hug around him and let him go. It was sad and sweet and there was a really strong spirit in the room. Alex and Steve, Alicia, Whitley and Edgar, Alecia and Mike and Lori, were all there in the room and we had so many hugs and tears. Teo joined us just afterward and said his goodbye. After the mortuary people took his body we went to my place for dinner. We had several family gatherings over the next week and that was super nice. We made his recipes or his favorite foods, looked at photo albums and scrapbooks, and reminisced. And of course built a puzzle (the last one he worked on).